Category Archives: friends

this quote reminds me of The Deistette


I stumbled over this quote by Kahlil Gibran from his book, The Prophet.  I love that book and haven’t thought of this quote in some time.

love it…

In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.

Emmie and I have been married a year today.  It’s been hard. But we’re still chugging away.  I find our best times, our funnest times are when we are by ourselves… no kids, no chores, no obligations… just us being friends.

Those times are very few and very far between.  But even during the mundane, the every day, with the burdens, the stress and tension of life… tension of each other…  we manage to brush off that stuff (might take a week or so but it gets brushed off) and laugh with each other and share pleasure.

[sigh]

We went on a date in early October of ’09.  That was five months ago.  I think the last date we had before that was in June of that year… maybe… I think.

I don’t know.

I love being married to her.  She is an amazing, beautiful, kind woman and wife.

I wish we had dated more though.

Love you Emmie.  Happy Anniversary.
The Deist and Deistette on a date Oct 2009

regret


I wrote about one of my dearest, bestest friends of my life after she got married. She is a wonderful, beautiful, caring sweet woman and I’m certain she is one of my soulmates.

She and her husband were married in May of last year and they got pregnant in mid-January. Although both, in their early 40′s, they knew trying to have a baby at this age might pose some risks and have its challenges.

But she wants a baby. She wants a baby so bad.

About eight years ago, she half jokingly asked if I would help her have a baby. I told her there was no way that was gonna happen. First of all I was married and secondly if there was a baby comin’ it was gonna be made the old fashioned way and I didn’t see that happening… AT ALL!

I told my wife (my wife at that time) about the conversation we’d had where Paula had made this ridiculous suggestion and my wife said it wasn’t so ridiculous at all. My wife, was an amazing person. She was surprisingly supportive of the idea and said if that was something we could give her (“we” because it would certainly need her support as well) that we should do that for her.

Well, we didn’t. I thought about it. I actually thought about having sex with my long-time best friend to try and have a baby with her but I just… couldn’t.

Anyway… She had boyfriends along the way and a couple who even talked of marriage but nothing until last year.

[sigh]

I talked to her this morning on the way to work. We don’t talk much anymore because she lives in New Braunfels, Tx and she’s married and life has just taken over. We used to have a standing “date”. Dinner every Tuesday to catch up but we barely talk but once every month or two now.

After a few minutes of catching up I asked how the baby making business was coming along. I thought to myself she should be about four months or so now.

[Paula serious in a serious whisper] “Jules.”
[slight pause]
“um… yeah.”
[Paula's voice cracks a little] “I miscarried”

The pain in her voice was so real it hurt me to my core. She said they were going to try again soon but she’s realistic and believes she won’t be able to carry a baby to term. She doesn’t think she’ll ever know what it’s like to have “her” baby inside “her” belly.

I sometimes wish I would have given her that baby eight years ago.

spring swap goodies


1spring-stuffI’m a little late posting this. I was supposed to show all my spring goodies when I received them a week or so ago. Sorry for the delay.

So one of my newer blog peeps, Sherri, over at LeClaw arranged for a little blog swap in celebration of the earth coming back into balance. I think there were eight or so of us participating in it. LeClaw got her Swap-O-Matic machine out, dumped our names into the hopper and swappy goodness ensued.

I was paired up to receive stuff from PHST (Pseudonymous High School Teacher) who just so happens to live in Huh-Wyy-Eeeee! Continue reading

brother can you spare a dime?


Hello friendly blog peeps, peepettes and casual visitors.

Today’s post is asking for a HUGE favor.

If you look to the right… right next to the title of this post you’ll see a picture. If you click it, the link will take you to my page on the Lone Star Chapter of The National Multiple Sclerosis Society’s website.

I’m writing about this because I want to let you know I’m riding my bicycle half way across Texas in an effort to raise funds for researchers to find a cure for MS. I’m riding in the 2009 MS 150 Bike Tour from Houston to Austin. It’s about 160 miles or so over two days.

I’m do it for two reasons. One… believe it or not, I find it fun and of course, challenging. (i’ve ridden this ride before) Two… I know I am extremely lucky to be able to move my body on my own and so I feel an obligation to help.

I want to help researchers find a cure for folks who don’t move so well because of this disease.

I’m no scientist. I don’t know much about this disease or what it will take to end it. But I can pedal my bike and ask people to donate to my ride so the smart guys can figure a way to help those who are afflicted with this disease.

So I hope you will.

I hope you can spare ten bucks… or five bucks… or three or even one.

I know five bucks or even one doesn’t seem like a lot but it all adds up.

When I was in the Marine Corps I learned a saying from the grunts… “ounces make pounds.” I first heard it when my unit attached with some grunts for training and we were going on a 13 mile hike carrying all our gear on our back.

A few of the guys took us “non-hackers” aside and said, “ounces make pounds, Marine. Let me see your gear.” They proceeded to show us how stripping every tiny piece of non-essential crap added up to a lot of weight.

“Ounces make pounds” folks. I know times are tough. Hell, I barely have two nickels to rub together but if you could donate whatever you can…

well, every little bit adds up to a lot.

as one dies another is born


When I was in high school i had quite a few friends, mostly because I was in the band, and that time in my life holds fond memories for me. I’m fortunate in that regard because I know a lot of people whose high school memories are ones of angst, dislike mixed with feelings of inferiority and inability to fit in.

But being a band geek, i had a tribe of accepting friends who never made me feel like the dork I really was…. perhaps “still am” is more accurate.

But there were four girls who were not in the band that I also ran around with and they accepted me into their little circle. One overweight, rather bubbly and quasi popular girl…Lisa T. One very overweight, very bubbly and not so popular girl… Dena. One very tall (six feet) lanky diamond in the rough drill team member… Lisa L. and another drill team member Phyliss, who had moderate success breaking into the popular crowd until she moved away our junior year. Continue reading

another wedding


My best friend… my closest, dearest very best friend got married recently. It was bitter sweet.

I have known her for almost 23 years. That fact alone is amazing to me.

I met her when she was 17… just a girl. She was a senior in high school and I, a freshman in college. She had come up to visit her brother who I knew through the music department and I was smitten at first sight.

Apparently she was, too. We were inseparable when she came to school the next fall. For three years we were together. At different times in those three years, we were in the band together although she was not a music major. We worked together although i was not a very good waiter. And we lived together for a year… neither one of us very good at compromise. Children playing house we were.

She transferred to Texas A&M and we kept a long distance relationship, talking of marriage and were making plans for the future. We mad God laugh. Continue reading

a nice way for re-entry


Well, i haven’t been writing much lately and I unfortunately haven’t been reading much either. My head’s been a little preoccupied with… well, with stuff.

So when my blog peep Little Miss French Horn tagged me I thought it was a nice way to get back into the blogging thing. So the meme info in quotes. Below are my answers. I don’t think mine are nearly as cool as Melon Girl… i mean c’mon. Arrested for running around nehked in a fountain.

FYI – you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 weird, random, facts, habits or goals about yourself. At the end, choose 6 people to be tagged, list their names & why you tagged them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment saying “You’re it!” & to go read your blog. You cannot tag the person that tagged you, so since you’re not allowed to tag me back; let me know when you are done so I can go read YOUR weird, random, facts, habits and goals.

Here are my responses. Continue reading

the phenomenon of proximity


I took a social psych class when I was in school and i remember a lecture where the instructor asked the class (those who were married, engaged, or had ever been in a serious relationship) to think about how they met. He waited a few seconds to let that sink in and he began to explain about percentages, statistics and equations that showed a direct link to relationships and the physical proximity of the participants of said relationship when the opportunity for the relationship to begin occurred.

ok, I can’t remember exactly what he said but it was something like that. Basically, he was saying the possibility for a relationship to begin Continue reading

My Grace is Gone


I met my friend Grace just as I first started blogging last summer. I felt quite connected to her after reading her words and we agreed that a kindred nature lay between us.

Her words are inspiring, thought provoking and so, so personal.

She is evolving and has recently stated she is going on what she believes will be a rather long hiatus from blogging… perhaps permanantly. In fact she says in her last post, “The season for The Wild Pomegranate is over.”

I believe her. There is a release and resignation in the tenor of the words of her post.

I’m sure many of you more seasoned bloggers have had people on your list of blog friends who have announced they are done with blogging only to come back after a couple of weeks or months. Grace has done that, too, but I think this time she is really gone. I really think she is gone.

I will miss you Grace.

philosophy from the stoners next door


A couple of houses down I have a neighbor who is for lack of a better label a stoner. The guy next to him is a stoner. And they have a buddy who is over every day.

Every single day.

And every single day they sit in the driveway or (when it’s too cold) in the garage with door open and drink beer and smoke dope.

They wax existential Continue reading